Building a Better Spouse Trap
Because of the pain of divorce, because of the agony of difficult marriages, and because marriage was God’s idea, it is important that we return to the subject of marriage on a regular basis. Today’s message is a little different, I am going to share six observations about the realities of married life, and offer implications to those who are casually dating or in serious courtship.
1. MARRIAGE DOES NOT MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY
If you are fundamentally an unhappy person, marriage will probably make it worse.
Implication: Learn to be content before you get married.
Contentment comes from qualities like:
Character: The ability to do what is right even when no one is watching
Purpose: knowing why are here and what you want to accomplish with your life
Humility: the ability to love and serve other people without applause or recompense
Faith: believing you are exactly where God wants you to be and that there is nothing to hard for him
Philippians 4:12, 13, I have learned the secret of contentment in any and every situation.
2. THE BEST OF MARRIAGES is BETWEEN THE best of friends
Making a life together requires a whole lot of give and take, communication, mutual support, grace and forgiveness. These are the domain of friendship.
Implication: Value Companionship over charm as you search or a spouse.
Genesis 2:18, I will make a companion who will help him.
Proverbs 31:30, Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last, but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
3. SEXUAL INTIMACY BEFORE MARRIAGE clouds JUDGEMENT
Sexual intimacy before marriage causes the heart to be deceived. Implication: Protect your purity and your heart.
Proverbs, 4:23, Above all else guard your heart, for it affects everything you do. 1 Corinthians 6:20, Honor God with your body.
4. FAITH BECOMES A BIGGER ISSUE AFTER YOU ARE MARRIED
It is not possible for a non-believing spouse to be neutral. Implication: Look for a spiritual partner. 2 Corinthians 6:14, Do not be yoked together with unbelievers.
5. THE NUMBER ONE CAUSE OF PROLONGED DISCORD IN MARRIAGE IS ARROGANCE
Implication: Seek wise counsel while you are courting. Proverbs 29:23, Pride ends in humiliation, while humility brings honor.
6. COMPROMISE IN COURTSHIP PRODUCES DISILLUSIONMENT IN MARRIAGE
Implication: Hang tough on your principles and trust God. 2
Proverbs 12:3, Wickedness never brings stability.
Psalm 25:21, May integrity and honesty protect me, for I put my hope in you. 3
